I actually forgot I had a livejournal... o_o It's kind of weird, reading all my previous posts. I was - and still am, just to a lesser extent. Or at least I'd like to think that way - so darn emo, haha. Oh God, I really don't like that word. Emo. Just... seriously, people? If kids are cutting themselves, why do you continue to make fun of them and make their lives worse? It's a serious problem.

...But that's for another time, because I don't feel like ranting.

Holy shit, hahahaha, are those Bodom mood thingers? How cute.

Yep.

I feel lazy and super tired. :( I'm supposed to be studying for my AP US Gov. test tomorrow (which I desperately need an A+ on), but I'm too lazy. I'm going to regret this tomorrow, I can tell.

I really want to be a good guitarist. Now. Unfortunately, school is in the way. Ugh.

...and I totally know it. :)

Pretty much everyone has been pissing me off lately (at school). Well, maybe except for ("surprisingly"?) Christine. But whatever. I won't let them or the mountain of homework I have for the weekend ruin this night! They can make me feel shitty tomorrow. Fridays are my relaxation days!

Trivium's new album is growing on me. God, it took its sweet time. I thought it was just kinda okay at first, but as I kept listening to it (thank you, shuffle options), the songs became sexier and sexier. I can't say the same for Metallica's Death Magnetic, though.

I wish I had a sexier amp. Playing is fun, but the lack of utter sexiness makes me very sad. Especially 'cause I'm playing alone. Boo. Where's JiYun~?

You don't listen to metal, honey. Really.

I know for fucking sure that I should've aced that fucking test. Goddamn motherfucker! I spent all fucking night just studying for that piece of shit you call a fucking test. I know for sure that no one should've gotten the motherfucking shit you entered in gradelink. I knew the answers to all your fucking questions. A D+? Bullshit, motherfucker. Let's put down those fucking drugs and wake up, shall we? Get that fucking tree trunk out of your ass and actually look at our fucking tests. You goddamn son of a bitch, something is wrong with you. Every day, you're so goddamn fucking moody, and who else do you take it out on other than your students? So what if we don't answer every fucking question you throw at us? You're such a whore. You know that stupid debate we had in class? I was the only fucking person talking for my group, motherfucker. I was the only one defending the shit I was forced to call a team, and the only fucking one replying and making it an actual fucking debate. How the fuck can you say that I got a B+ for fucking participation? Fuck you, you motherfucking son of a bitch!

:)

Today started out extremely well. I've got to say that today, I actually had an okay (almost fun) time at church. I think God's intervening in my life now, just as I prayed for him to almost an entire year ago.

I've been confused with life in general these days. As written in my previous entries, nothing excites me anymore. Everyday, it's the same routine: wake up, wash, go to school, see the same people, come home, do homework, eat dinner, play guitar (if there's time), and sleep. Even the things that used to excite me weren't very fun anymore. I released my stress through music - playing guitar, listening to metal, etc. It helped, but they were like anti-depressants - temporary relief, but not a complete cure.

School retreats used to really get to me. The sermons, worship, and the true feeling of unity brought me to tears, and I really felt a connection with God. However, as our school grew in size, this began to change. The sermons, no matter how fiery they were, drew nothing but yawns from me. Singing praise songs with my school, which was once something that boosted my spirit up to God, no longer had the same effect. Everything was just annoying; it felt like a waste of my time.

I prayed. Although I kept on getting distracted and sometimes ended up not finishing said prayers, I kept on trying to get into the habit of talking to God. Of course, I never felt any of the 'connection' or 'communication' people say they've felt. And honestly, I still don't. But I kept on trying.

At first, nothing changed, and I kind of grew discouraged. Actually, things grew worse. The whole world was in a recession, and my family wasn't one of the lucky few that were still doing 'well'. As written above and in previous entries, I lost interest in everything. I had no motivation to make anything of myself. If it wasn't for music, I really don't think I would've done anything smart.

I guess today marks some kind of new chapter. Last night, I prayed for three main things.

1) For myself to stop being so apathetic about everything
2) For my family's (and the world's) financial problems to be solved
3) For my love life to be in his hands (luls)

And you know what? I didn't fall asleep during today's sermon. I wasn't even sleepy.

Pastor Ben's message was this: no matter how many mistakes you make, as long as you repent, God will still love you and accept you. To be honest, that didn't get me all emotional or anything. Heck, I really didn't feel anything, either. But his message, as cliche as it may be, kind of made me think.

If I repent for all my wrongdoings; if I repent for all the people I've hated; if I repent for all the hurtful words I've said; if I repent for all the horrible thoughts that ran through my head, would God's presence be more evident in my life? I needed something visual or at least audible. I can't just believe what a book and some pastors say. I need to see it.

Sophia's been talking about how if we don't forgive others, God won't forgive us, and so on and so forth. As usual, I didn't feel anything, but it got me to think. I guess today's message comforted whatever worries (if I had any) that plagued my mind.

Although it's not much, I think my mom and dad are going to start taking over my school's lunch. Fortunately, the pastor of our church allowed them to use the church's kitchen. So I guess this is also a new chapter in our financial book.

The food was honestly horrible today. So with my last dollar, I went to 7 Eleven and bought some strawberry mentos. I came back, but I couldn't get in the car and listen to my iPod 'till we left because the adults had some kind of PTA meeting. And until they came out, I was just kinda hanging out with Joshua, Caleb, and Aaron. Oh, and John too, but he came later on. It was a nice change from being alone, or being surrounded by annoying fobs and vain bitches.

And now, Edward just revealed something that completely shocked me. I guess I can safely say that I envy him for having such a close relationship with God. I like to think that the dark chapters of my life, which have been surfacing quite often recently, is going to be used for Him in the future. I like to imagine that God is trying to make me like John, which makes me feel a whole lot better. Because honestly, I like John's sermons testimonies. They're more thought-provoking than any other sermons, and I actually feel something.

Eh, enough of that. I just felt like writing this 'cause Edward is just so awesome. I would like to say inspirational, but if you've been reading my previous entries, you'd know that I've been lacking inspiration and motivation these days.

Dear Hannah,

I don't really know how to tell you this, but I dislike you. I think I realized it when your dwarf bit me in your camping car and I saw you pull the toupee off my best friend. I'm sure you're senile enough to understand that Santa doesn't exist. I'm returning your ring to you, but I'll keep oil stocks as a memory. You should also know that I will tell the authorities about eggplant-fetishism.

Good luck on your short-term leave from jail,
Clara.

No matter how much I practice, I never feel as if I've improved at all. Obviously, I've never expected myself to become some kind of rock star in just 3 days or anything, but this just seems really ridiculous. After four straight hours of practice, I still don't think I got any better at neither the small solo nor the beginning riff for Sweet Child O' Mine. I can play it perfectly fine sitting down, but everything falls into pieces once I stand up and try to play it - especially the beginning riff. Most of the time, I can't even make the notes ring out like they're supposed to. Other times, I miss the string entirely. And occasionally, I mute the strings I have to play.

Well, that's enough of that. As much as I love guitar, it really stresses me out sometimes. But it's okay. I know I'm improving - albeit slowly. Extremely slowly.

Anyway, after around 4 hours of practicing, I decided to stop and just relax for a bit. I would've continued, but 1) I was/am fucking hungry as hell, and 2) I'm tired. :( I was up all night trying to memorize the notes for AP US Government, finishing up History homework, perfecting my English outline, etc. Good news it that the tests seemed extremely easy today. Hopefully, the answers I wrote down were right. Pfft, 'hopefully' my ass. Of course they're fucking right.

I really need to break that habit of going on tangents. Eh, whatever. But as I was saying, as I stopped practicing, I opened up my iTunes and, with shuffle on, pressed play. The little piece of crap seemed to love me today (for once), because the first song that came up was Angels Don't Kill by Children of Bodom. This song is fucking awesome for two reasons: 1) It was the first CoB song I heard / the song that had me hooked to CoB, and 2) It just sounds fucking awesome. So after the song of ultimate sexiness ends, Sixpounder starts playing. Like pretty much everyone else, I have a habit of singing along with songs that play, even if they're impossible for me to sing. Any-freakin'-way, the part that really stuck out today was this:

I refuse to be brought down by you
Praise is far away from what you do

Sexy, no? I think so. And since I just completely lost my train of thought, I'll end this entry here.

So boring. I'm not being suicidal or whatever when I say this, but these days, life seems to be so dull, I can't really see anything enjoyable about it. I really don't know what's up with me lately, to be honest. I've been a real bitch to pretty much everyone, but I really can't help it. My temper is short as fuck; I'm pretty much running on a quickly burning fuse that's about an inch in length. Everything and everyone grates on my nerves, and I simply don't have the patience to deal with it.

I'm losing "friends" (refer to the previous post to understand the difference between friends and "friends") because of my behavior, but the part that had me reflecting a bit was the fact that I didn't care. Maybe it's the 'Elijah-mentality' settling in, haha. I said that I didn't care what other people said about me in the past, but to me honest, it was kind of a lie. I did care, but not as much as a majority of the people around me. Now, however, I really, really don't care. I can't give a shit even if I tried. I'm being honest, and expressing my thoughts in the way I feel like expressing them. If the people around me don't like it, then too fucking bad. It's just the way I (think) I really am.

I can't stand Shannon's class. It's the most boring piece of shit I've ever learned in my entire life. I don't think the fact that we're fucking sophomores have registered in her brain yet, because she's treating us like we don't know anything at all. We all know the fucking MLA format and how to properly cite. We're not the fucking class that plagiarized our book reports, and if she knew half as much as she claims to know, she would understand that. Quite frankly, I really don't care if you sleep at 2 AM every day and wake up at 6. It's your fucking fault for not managing your time and schedule well. You're at an age where you should be prepared to take full responsibility for your actions and the consequences that come with them, so don't start to fire off complaints at our faces. I. Don't. Fucking. Care. We never said we were fucking tired. We never complained and said, "Shannon teacher, I'm sleepy". Get that through your thick head, you goddamn motherfucker.

Steve, I hate your class and your stupid tests. It's boring as fuck.

Caroline's really testing my patience these days too. I miss the days when I only used to see her twice a week, mostly because she was much more bearable then. She was okay when I first met her. A bit Really stupid, yes, but entertaining nonetheless. It took me one year, almost two, to finally realize how annoying she can be. I guess I should've listened to Michael and Richard. However, I trusted Caroline to not turn out to be the type of girls that I absolutely detest, so I shoved them away from my life instead of her. That just has to be one of the greatest mistakes I've ever made. Yeah, Michael and Richard are a bit arrogant, but they were way more fucking fun to hang out with than Caroline, who couldn't hold a decent, intelligent conversation with for more than five seconds. Everything she does just looks so stupid and deliberately slow, and I can't stand it. I'm completely aware of my faults, and I'm actually trying to fix them (albeit slowly). But her, oh my fucking God, she needs to get a fucking brain and understand that just attending to NCA won't get her into a good college. Not when she's not putting in the effort. I think it's pretty obvious that she'll be staying with the 10A people until we graduate. The part that makes her stupidity shine even more? She doesn't want to get better. She doesn't even want to try and come up to 10B. But you know what? I don't fucking care. She can do whatever the fuck she wants with her life. I give up caring for shit like her. All the fucking background shit my mom and I did for her will stop now. No use trying to save a dead dog.

Jane, don't try to be someone you're not. If no one likes you when you honestly express yourself, then too fucking bad. It's not like the world's going to end if you go through high school with no 'best friend'.

For the most part, I don't think I'm self-motivated. As retarded as this sounds, I think it took me watching Eagle Eye with Christine and JiYun to realize that. My parents like to believe that I'm like Ethan Shaw - a self-motivated, hard-working girl who will eventually get into an Ivy League university and graduate to become a successful lawyer. I beg to differ. I think I'm more like Jerry Shaw - not self-motivated and pretty much lazy. I gain and lose interest faster than you can blink. If I say that I like a guy, then I most likely won't be saying the same thing a month or so later. I wanted to learn piano more than anything, but after a year or two, I did everything in my power to quit. I was extremely passionate about archery, but look at me now. I detest the fucking sport, and wish that I never learned it in the first place. I wanted to learn table tennis, but I lost all desire to do so a month later. What the fuck am I supposed to do? I can't exactly force myself to do any of the shit that I really don't want to do. I've tried, especially with archery. It didn't work.

(Almost) Anyone that has known me for more than two days know that I'm in love with guitar. Sure, I don't know much about it, but that doesn't mean I don't want to spend a majority of my time just playing, learning, and getting better. When I play guitar, I temporarily forget about whatever shit is bugging me, because all I'm concentrating on is producing the right sounds at the right time. My focus is completely on improving. However, my passion for playing guitar often makes me wonder, 'will I get sick of this eventually as well?'. Probably, but I really hope not. I'm clinging onto the small sliver of hope that I'll continue to love and play the guitar. You see, there's one thing that separates my passion for guitar and the passion I had for pretty much everything else. I have heroes - people I can look up to and hope to become. People like Zakk Wylde, Dimebag Darryl, Rhandy Rhoads, and (most importantly), Alexi Laiho really inspire me. I've never had anyone inspire me before in archery, education, etc., so I'm really hoping my desire to become as good as my idols is enough to pull me through.

Wow, I wrote a lot today. I wasn't even angry, either, haha! I was actually kind of happy that I finished my homework somewhat early. Well, not really. I brought my fucking Physics book when I didn't need to, and the book I really needed (AP US History) was left at school. Fuck. Whatever. I'm off to eat dinner now. Tata~

I hate school. We can't even practice with the band except for on Wednesdays and Fridays (club times), 'cause the people upstairs were complaining about the noise. Pssh, fuck that. Right when I got into the habit of not eating during lunch, too! Goddamn it.

Today sucked. For the first time, I got an F. A FUCKING F. It was on AP Government. God, I hate that class (even if debating is somewhat amusing). It's for seniors, not sophomores! So now, my AP Gov. grade dropped down to an A-. My stupid Korean grade is still an A-, and my fucking Algebra 2 grade dropped to a B+. It's all because of last Friday. I failed every fucking test! Ugh, good thing AP US History is so damn easy. -_-; English is kinda easy too, but I can't really say much about it yet. I hate Shannon, though. I want Elijah to be my English teacher again.

Alexi's so fucking awesome. I mean, come on. Songs like Implosion of Heaven when he was 14 or 15ish, and the sexy songs in the Something Wild album when he was 17/18. Of course, the other members are just as sexy. <3

I'm so goddamn full, but I can't stop eating these grapes. :( They taste so sweet! <3 It's like the cherry thing all over again. Bleh, tummy ache~ I really want that Edwards E-AL-166! Well, I actually want the ESP one, but I don't have fucking $2,000+ to just pull out of my pocket. Damn you ESP!

Ugh, tomorrow's a Tuesday. The week's going by so slowly! I wish it was just Monday, Wednesday, and Friday. Oh, wait. Make that Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, and Sunday. I need that Thursday for the only exercise they make us freakin' do. Come on, guys. It's just one fucking mile to run. Sometimes, I just wish we did more, just so I can see everyone get pushed to their breaking points. But anyway.

Jane was quite annoying today, but only at the end of the day. Okay, so no one knows the fucking Physics problem. So what? That doesn't mean you can act like a fucking baby and cry about it. "No one's helping me!" Yeah, right. No one knows the fucking answer! This annoyed me so much, I really almost just cussed Christine out, which wasn't right. Ugh, I'm getting so annoyed by everything these days. I think it's because of school. Nothing can be more frustrating than Algebra 2, Physics, and fucking AP Government!

I really want to win that stupid cow drawing contest. I need that $5,000! Ugh... around $1600ish (I'm not too sure. How much is shipping from Japan to US + customs?) for the guitar, $300-400 for a new amp, $200 for clothes (Wildchild Industries, haha!)... and that's it, actually. I don't need anything else. Of course, I'd give the remaining $2,800 to my parents, 'cause we really need the money. Fucking economy crisis. Bleh... too bad I'm not creative enough to think of something fantabulous, or even optimistic enough (at least right now) to think that I'm creative enough. Eh, whatever. THE LORD PROVIDES.

I really hate it when Celine starts talking about how friends are so fucking important, you need to have 109203 of them. Yeah, right. I don't think that she understands how I view friendship. I don't really give a shit if I have a lot of friends or not. As long as a have a few that I can completely trust with my life, I'm okay with that. Hell, I like it that way. I don't need to constantly be surrounded by 30 people and know all about their lives, because honestly, I couldn't care less. I don't like to use the term 'best friend' because I think it's stupid. A friend is a friend, and that's that. No use giving them ranks like that.

To me, there's only two types of friends: the true friends, and the... well, the friends. I'm willing to tell my true friends about everything, and if they need help, I'll be more than glad to give them some. With the true friends, I'm completely sure that they'd do the same for me, maybe even more. That's what I love about them. We have this mutual trust and respect between us. They accept me for who I am, and vice versa. The regular friends, however... well~ they're okay. Most of them are even fun. I like to hang out with them, but I won't be willing to sacrifice too much for them. Because to be honest, I'm a selfish person; I care about myself more than others, and that's something I really can't change. It's just in my nature.

And... yeah. I think I'll end it here for tonight/now. But knowing myself, there's a high chance of me coming back and posting another entry, just 'cause I like rambling.

Wow, it's been forever since I last posted on LJ. Well, obviously (or maybe not), my musical interests have more or less changed quite drastically. Don't get me wrong, though. JRock is still awesome, but it just doesn't cater to my needs anymore. Now, it's all about metal. Don't start wondering whether it's power metal, death metal, or anything like that.

"Every fuckin’ band makes their own label and style of music or whatever. I just call it metal and that’s that." -Alexi Laiho (Children of Bodom)

I totally agree. Stop making things complicated for me by giving sub-genres. Anyway. I was supposed to post something earlier (at around 3, because that's when I came home and realized that I was bored beyond reasoning), but I was busy eating / playing guitar / changing my default icon and mood themes.

It's 7:34 right now, and I'm still shocked that I just wasted a good four hours of a weekend doing absolutely nothing. Don't say, 'well, you should've spent your time practicing your guitar so you'd be less of a shitty player', because, well... I did play for an hour or so. But anyone would get bored if the only song they were playing was Slither (by Velvet Revolver) over and over again. Goddamn 'band'. Sweet Child O' Mine (by Guns n' Roses) wasn't any better. In fact, it was worse, 'cause playing it while standing up is super freakin' hard for me. But enough of that.

I want to see CoB live again. It was at the Wiltern (again, ugh), and honestly, that night was one of the best nights in my life. Ever. Okay, so I didn't catch anything (damn you, Andy!), but I was in the way front of the mosh pit (right in front of Alexi) and touched Jaska's hand. Yay. Seeing Alexi live inspired me way more than anything else. Burn my guitar (it will become plural in the future, goddamn it) if I go to my grave as an unaccomplished guitarist. Actually, don't. You won't want an angry spirit after you, trust me.

Jonas Brothers fails. Songs with four chords? Three ugly boys singing? No thanks, really. JiYun was telling me about these losers who were bashing her for saying that Jonas Brothers sucked, and what they wrote had me laughing for quite a while. So the guy I think plays guitar for their little band, Kevin, is 20 years old, right? The reason his fans think this guy is the best guitarist in the world is way beyond me. Come on, people. How can Kevin Jonas be the best when you have people like Alexi Laiho, Zakk Wylde, and Dimebag Darryl? Let's try to be realistic here. Alexi and the other CoB members recorded the Something Wild album when they were 17 and 18 year-olds. (Alexi and Jaska recorded songs like Implosion of Heaven when they were what, 14?) Zakk Wylde was chosen to play for OZZY OSBOURNE when he was just 18. And Dimebag? Well, I think we all know the legacy he left behind.

...Yeah, I think that's enough for now. I'm off to play some guitar so that I can beat Andy's ass become as good as Alexi.

It was fun. :D

Right after teh ebil samulnori (Korean drums... eww) class ended, my parents dropped me off at Little Tokyo Shopping Center. I met up with Alix, Zeandra, this girl, and two other guys. :D

We went to Max Karaoke Studio. It was unbelievably hot! @_@

We stressed out a lot about finding Diru and stuff. xD The music list thingy was all in Japanese~! >x<

Anyway, Zeandra and I sung Lie Buried with a Vengeance (Diru), Child Prey (Diru), Make You Free (Kimeru), and several more~ It was fun. :D

And then we went to go eat ramen! It was godly. <3 AND AND AND! YOSHIKI ATE AT THE PLACE WE WENT TO. Alix, Zeandra, and I took pictures of his autograph, which was posted on teh wall~ It was awesome! Then we ate ice creeaammm, and then I had to go home. :3 Was fun, hope we can do it again sometime... ...when I improve my Kyonese! >:D

Went to the beach with mah school today. Had lotsa fun with Eunice, Mary, and Hannah... it's just too bad I got sunburned and so damn tanned it's not even funny. D:

Dockweiler Beach was SUPER clean at first sight. The water was really pretty, and the sand wasn't littered with trash. The only bad part was the yellow stuff in the water, but whatever. xD Eunice and Hannah rushed in teh water, but Mary and I decided not to (at first). That's 'cause they had swimming suits, and we didn't. >x<; Too bad we ended up getting completely drenched. xD We jumped over waves, rode waves, went under waves, got crushed by waves, etc. :D Yep, it was fun.

Then we ate pizza for lunch. Got annoyed by this preppy-ish girl... Sharon or Shannon, I forgot. :X After eating, we planned to stay dry and just build sand castles or whatever, but then I ended up dragging Hannah back to teh waters. xP Then we met Jason teacher, and he just kinda lifted me up and literally threw me sideways into huge waves. o_x

...Yeeaaah. Then we camwhored for a bit before we left. ;D Eunice is definitely the most photogenic out of us all, haha! xD Then we hopped in Steve teacher's (the skinnier one / the not Korean one) car and went back to school, where mah dad picked me up. :D Steve teacher's pretty cool, though. He let us listen to our iPods, and he has some pretty nice heavy metal / rock songs, which was fun to listen to on our way to the beach and back.

Uwah~ >x< I'm so tan and sunburned! I dun like it! D:

Wrote this on the night I came back. xD I kinda forgot to post it, though. (Thanks for reminding me, Zeandra! >_< Sorry I couldn't respond to your IM, my internet's such a bitch.)

Was wearing: Dir en Grey Tour07 Inward Scream Shirt and my concert jeans. <3

Yune dropped me off at Universal Studios at around 3:00 PM. I spent at least 10 minutes looking for the Gibson Amphitheatre, which was actually harder to spot than I thought. I saw this girl near the huge spinning globe thing (she was a Diru fan too. The IS shirt brings us all together!), and it appeared that she was lost as well. In the end, we asked the Universal Studios people for directions. The line wasn't very long, and most of the people were Deftones fans (I only saw like, 4-5 Diru fans). I was surprised there was even a line, seeing as how Gibson Amphitheatre, unlike the Wiltern, was NOT first come, first served. Anyway... it was disgustingly hot. We died. XD

Yeah, we talked a bit about this and that, mostly about JRock. Her (nick?)name was Twister, and she was a vocalist in a band. Pretty cool. :D Not to mention her hair was <3. *-*

Mm, yeah. Zeandra said she'd be late (she was at AX), so I said I'd wait. Twister waited with me (<3) until it turned 7. I left Zeandra's ticket with the will call thing and went. They checked our tickets and our bodies (it tickled, and I felt violated!) before allowing us in.

I suggested that we buy merchandise first, so we did. There were 2 Diru shirts, one I dunno what it's called, a wristband thingy, Marrow of a Bone CD, and Withering to Death CD... + a crapload of Deftones stuff. I bought the wristband. Twister had only 7 bucks, but in the line, I gave her $10. The shirt was $30, so I just ended up giving her another $20 to buy the shirt (the green one). Much to our surprise, we both received Dir en Grey postcards... signed by all five of them.

Uh, yeah. After our "OMG I'M SO HAPPY AMAGAWUHIDNBAWHDBAWD" moment, we split up. She was up in the balcony area (I think...) and I was a bit behind the pit. So we went our separate ways, but not before I got her number, haha!

The Fall of Troy played first. I was surprised when they weren't as bad as I thought they would be.

And then, oh God, they started setting up the things for Dir en Grey. The roadies came, checked the equipment, and a huuuggeee banner thing with DIRENGREY on it was hung in the back. I could hardly wait. When the lights turned off and GDS started playing, I went crazy.

I screamed super loud (shocking the person in front of me. Loser Deftones fan.), and started chanting 'kill'. There were a few Diru fans throughout the theatre, and we all did our best to support Dir en Grey as they performed. It was simply AMAZING. Kyo and Toshiya can jump HIGH. xD Oh, and I couldn’t see Shinya very well. D: I only saw the top part of his head, and his arm – sometimes.

Some Deftones bitches were yelling fuck you, you suck, etc. so this is what I did in response to those two things.

Deftones idiot: FUCK YOU!
Me: Go fuck yourself, bitch! D:<

Deftones idiot: You suck!
Me: Your face sucks, asshole.

Just... seriously. Fucking Deftones fans have issues.

(While Diru performed, I was screaming, cheering, singing along, moving my arms around like an idiot, clapping the air, etc.) By the way, Kyo’s dancing was sexy. xD

Although I'm not 100% sure of its accuracy, this is what they played:

GDS Opening
Repetition of Hatred
Grief
Ryoujoku no Ame
Disabled Complexes
Saku
The Final (Zeandra came right when they started playing this song) So I can’t live~
Kyo's solo thingy, which led into...
Dead Tree (He started cutting himself here… left chest)
Merciless Cult
The Deeper Vileness
The IIID Empire

Wai~ My ankles/legs/arms/throat/neck still hurt from all that jumping/screaming/cheering/headbanging/etc. I did. <3 It was really fun, though! I don’t know how to explain this correctly… when you see them actually perform live (instead of watching them through some sort of screen), you feel a different kind of excitement. Just by listening and watching to Toshiya, Die, Kaoru, and Shinya play… just by hearing Kyo sing, you start to feel all the hard work, energy, and -emotions- they put into their music. It never fails to move my heart, and, like I did at their Inward Scream tour, I cried.

Zeandra and I left as soon as Diru was gone. She wanted to buy some merchandise, so we headed over to the merchandise counter. That's when we met John, who told us that a friend of his told him that Diru was going to sign some stuff...

So I rushed Zeandra. xD She bought the Diru shirt with the green thing on it (no postcard, though, so I'm assuming they ran out). We then commenced our search for Diru. After looking around everywhere and stuff, we were about to go out (no re-admission). But then I saw this girl and asked her if Diru was signing stuff, and she said, "Yeah, Kyo's signing. I got my ticket signed. It's over at Door 14."

We ran. I got there before Zeandra, so I was able to see the tip of Kyo's head before he disappeared. D: DAMN YOU, KYO! I WANT YOUR SIGNATURE ON MY TICKET, COME BACK! (Well, I kinda wanted Shinya, Die, Kaoru, or Toshiya, since I already had Kyo's signature on a Diru poster).

I met up with Twister again, and we (John, Zeandra, and a couple other Diru fans) just kinda waited outside the door Kyo disappeared in. I touched the chair that he sat on, so, as Zeandra said, I indirectly touched his ass. Whoo! xD Kyo-ness. <3

The guy from the office-y area opened the door and let us in, just to show us that Kyo wasn't there anymore. Apparently, the little devil went through this locked door. -_- Damn. So our small mob waited. And waited. And... we waited. Eventually, a couple people left as we started roaming around, looking for Dir en Grey. (We did this forever... but it was only me, Zeandra, Twister, and John, since every other Diru fan kinda left...)

Oh, and we saw one of the Diru roadies with this blonde girl (who spoke fluent Japanese). John tried to speak Japanese to him to ask him where Diru / their tour buses were, but the roadie kinda got confused. So the girl translated for us, and he said that they were all backstage (dressing room?), and that he was sorry. Bleeh. xD I think we freaked him out. (Although 4 people, 1 being a kid, 1 being injured won’t really be able to jump him that easily…)

We did some random as heck things. But yeah, it was definitely nice hanging out with them, it was really fun. Not to mention I showed them my acrobatics skills! >:D Oh yeah, and since it was really loud, we ended up hearing some parts of Deftones. They sucked major ass.

Erm... yeah... we ended up waiting forever, pissing lotsa security guards off. xD We just went crazy, screaming FOOCHA! and stuff like that just totally randomly. The wall was kinda vibrating 'cause I guess there was something within it, and as a joke, we were like, "Yeah, Kyo's microwaving the babies because he's hungry." The funny thing is, a guy with a lot of trashbags came later, so we laughed and said, "The remains of the babies Kyo ate." And the guy picked one bag up and held it out to us, it was kinda weird. xD

In the end, we never saw Kyo... or any other Diru member. -_- Ah well. It was still kind of fun. While we were all heading out, Zeandra and Twist kept on yelling, ‘I’LL RAPE YOUR DAUGHTER ON YOUR GRAVE!’ and stuff like that. <3 Gotta love ASOM!

http://www.myspace.com/raiexiii

R'aie XIII is still relatively unpopular. But really, I think they're great!! They did Diru covers, too, and I honestly think they're the best covers I've ever heard.

xD Zeandra and I called the vocalist the 'Taiwanese Kyo'.

Here's a few samples:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=64tcqfKElFI Agiated Screams of Maggots
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yAbhAk2dESE Clever Sleazoid
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=80bNMwu_iBc The IIID Empire

I became an instant fan. *-*

I got this set list from the official JRock Revolution website.

Kagrra,
Kotodama
Arishi Hi no Bishou
Nue no Naku Koro
Yousai
Utakata
Urei

DuelJewel
Hanauta
Kamisori
Reincarnation Flow
Mxxder Marble
Tales

-miyavi-
Selfish Love
Rock n' Roll is Not Dead
Kabuki Boiz
-Neo Visualizm- Sakihokoru Hana no Yoni
Are You Ready to Rock?

Vidoll
nevaeH
Sangakoronda
Tomei Nakago
Chocoripeyes
Ningyo

alice nine.
Velvet
Red Carpet Going On
Yami ni Chiru Sakura
-Nine Heads Rodeo Show-
Haikara-naru-rondo
(Encore) Blue Planet

Girugamesh
Volcano
Shadan
Owari to Mirai
Fukai no Yami
Omae ni Sasageru Minikui Koe
Take a Look Around
Deceived Mad Pain

D'espairsRay
Damned
Angeldust
Mirror
Closer to Ideal
Screen
Kogoeru Yoru ni Saita Hana
Sixty-Nine
Hollow

MUCC
Gokusai
Rojiura Boku to Kimie
Saishu Ressha
Dog
Nijyu-goji no Yuutsu
Libra
Utsuro no Heya
Ryu Sei

Here's the Kagrra, interview.

Can you please introduce yourselves for our readers who may not be familiar with your band?
Akiya: I'm Akiya, I play guitar.
Izumi: I'm Izumi, the drummer.
Isshi: I'm the vocalist, Isshi.
Nao: I'm Nao. (bass)
Shin: Shin. (guitar)

Your PVs are always visually stunning, do you have a hand in the concept and theme of each video, or do you leave it to the director?
Isshi: The basic concept belongs each song, the imagery is decided by the lyrics.

You've been known to wearing very traditional clothing at lives, what were your reasons behind that?
Isshi: The band's concept is to present the Japanese traditions and culture to the world, this is why we chose to present ourselves this way.

You've never played in the US before, are you excited about the show?
Isshi: We're very excited about it, we heard the tickets sold out already!

What would you like to see while you're in the US?
Isshi: Burger King! (everyone laughs)

Why did you decide to take part in JRock Revolution?
Isshi: We feel very lucky to get this gig. The timing was just right; there are so many people interested in Japanese culture right now, and it's the perfect time for us to present our music to the world.

Are you interested in doing a one-man tour of the US?
Isshi: We're very interested in the idea, we'd love to have our own tour.

Could you describe kagrra,'s style?
Isshi: Our music is not as "rock and roll" as other visual bands. We would like to be able to present more music for people to make their own decision about our music.

Do you feel that being a Visual Kei band gives you more freedom to express your own style and experiment?
Isshi: Yes, we like to be more free to make music that we feel, and not have to work by a set of rules laid out by someone else.

Next year will be the 10th anniversary of the time you all began to play together as Crow, do you have any special plans to celebrate?
Izumi: True, we did start as Crow, but we'd prefer to celebrate the 10th anniversary of kagrra, so we don't have any special plans.

For each of you, what is one of your biggest memories over the years together?
Isshi: My biggest memory is when I was in the hospital. I was only there for a day, but afterwards I was too sick to perform at our live, and I had to stay in the hotel.
Nao: Tomorrow will be a day for us to make huge memories together. We're really looking forward to it.
Akiya: My biggest memory is when we first began to wear our kimonos people laughed at us, but after several years people began to think "Oh, these guys are cool". At that point, we were really happy because people began to accept us and our goals. That's a great memory for me.
Izumi: There are so many memories. I think the first time we were the headliners at a show, that's my biggest memory.
Shin: My biggest memory is of our first gig. We hired a stylist to help us with our outfits, but the stylist never showed up. So we had to sit backstage at our very first gig and make our own clothes. (everyone laughs)

How do you think the music scene has changed in the time you've been a part of it?
Isshi: We don't really pay attention to the scene. It is always changing, and though we are inspired by some music, we try to keep our own spirit and not let it be tainted by the scene.

You've been on tour with alice nine and miyavi before. What's it like to be playing with them again?
Isshi: Everybody here is friends, so we're really enjoying it. And since we all know each other, it will be a sort of a competition tomorrow, we'll do our best to try and win (laughing).

Isshi, we've heard that you do vocal training with an opera singer. How long have you been working with her?
Isshi: I'm still working with her even now. It's been about 2 years since I began.

Your song "Chikai no tsuki" was used as a theme for the anime "Kinnikuman II yo ultimate muscle 2"; how did the opportunity for that tie-in come about?
Isshi: We were actually looking for the opportunity to get in to the animation industry in Japan. We really tried hard to get this anime because it's one that we grew up with. We were really happy to be able to do it.

Nao, Akiya and Izumi, you've had two side projects: Devil Christ 13 and Dragon Head. Why did you create these bands?
(all 3 laugh)
Nao: We did it just for fun, for the fanclub.

Nao, you were the vocalist for both bands, would you ever consider singing for kagrra, such as a duet with Isshi?
Isshi: HELL NO! (Everyone laughs)

Would you ever open your fanclub to international fans?
Isshi: Yes, that's definitely coming. We want to become more popular in the world wide scene.

If you ran PS Company, what would the initials PS stand for?
Akiya: Peace smile.

Many fans are afraid to send fan mail because they can't speak or write Japanese. Are you open to receiving fan mail in other languages?
Isshi: Yes, please send it. We have a translating program for email.

Do each of you have a final message for your fans?
Akiya: Many fans can't come see us in Japan, so please check out our English website, and please come see us tomorrow.
Izumi: I'd really like to tour the US and see all the fans worldwide.
Isshi: Stay close, we're going to show you Japanese traditions.
Nao: We can't come to the US very often, but please look at our blogs on our website.
Shin: Please support us, so we can come back to America again!

http://youtube.com/watch?v=fFudw8Q0tNw

Haha, you can see my back at around 00:42. I'm playing Uno with Laura and Eunice. xD This isn't the whole line, it's only part of it. Mm... not sure of the time, but it's before 3:00. I think. Iunno. xD

I MISS JROCK REVOLUTION! Happen again in LA plx.

Oh. My. God. I LOVED TODAY. ('Cept I got nothing... but whatever. Rame's candy is good enough. <3)

'Kay, so I got to the Wiltern at around 7:00 AM in the morning. The line was different; instead of circling around the block like it usually does, it went in a straight line, separating fans with cars, buses, and the streets. It was actually pretty long, much to my disappointment. Many, if not all, of the fans in the WAY front were those who were unable to attend yesterday's concert, and so lined up for today's last night.

Anyway, I sat down near the entrance of Sizzler, utterly bored after the first five minutes. Blah blah blah. :3 And then I made friends with two girls who got in line after me, Laura (half Chinese) and Eunice (Korean). Laura was quite similar to me (we're both JRock addicts <3), unlike Eunice, who was new to JRock.

We first passed time by playing Uno, eating, etc. Eventually, we just settled for staring at the people walking back and forth, from the beginning of the line to the end, quietly rating their "hotness" on a scale from 1-10. It was quite funny, actually. (I saw Enna! :3 She's this REALLY, REALLY REALLY PRETTY girl that I saw both at the Avalon (Dir en Grey's Tour07 Inward Scream) and yesterday. We complimented her quite a bit, honestly revering her beauty, grace, etc. Just... seriously. xD She was tall, pretty, and VERY slim - you know, the type that would match in just about ANY type of clothing.

Eventually, we got the courage to actually compliment the fans out loud, and even asked for pictures. :D! For example, there's this one guy with a REALLY cool jacket blouse thingy. It's just plain white... except with the "blood" splattered artistically over it, as well as the Japanese written on the back - in "blood", of course. There was also that guy, who was REALLY hot. xD We were like, "Can we take a picture of you guys?" and they (the hot guy his two friends) were like, "Uh, sure.". So they stood in a line while I took the picture with my cellphone, and Eunice & Laura with their cameras. Haha, and there was this guy who was running back and forth, back and forth. xD It was kinda funny. Oh my God, and then there was these weird people... xD Two guys. Yes, MALES. The taller one, a white guy, was wearing a VERY VERY SHORT SHORT skirt (so short, you can see his butt cheeks when he walked), and lipstick. Very... ew. His companion had no shirt, and his pants were quite low - low enough to reveal his boxers. Ew?

Laura and Eunice started talking about the "red guy". Apparently, they had seen a guy wearing red in McDonalds (they saw his back), and were intent on hunting him down. They were absolutely sure he was totally hot. Well, Laura was sure. Eunice was ike, 95% sure, 'cause she kinda thought that "red guy" could be a "red girl". So they searched while I saved their spots, but came back empty handed.

And then he walked by. Donned in a long, loose red trench coat thing held together in the middle with a chain and a button (?) and black pants, he was the epitome of perfection. All three of us, Eunice, Laura, and I, froze as he walked by. Perfect. That was the first word that came to mind as soon as I lay eyes on him. While Eunice and Laura squealed after he had gone out of hearing range, saying that he was the "red guy" they had been searching for, I stood perfectly still. My eyes had met his for a moment as he strode past us, and that was enough to send me all the way to Cloud 99999999999999. Never had I seen a guy as perfect, sexy, hot, etc. as he. The next time he came by, we had the courage to ask if we could take his picture.

If I didn't know any better, I'd say he was a JRocker. Yes, that's how flawless he seemed to me. His skin was smooth and pale, clear of any blemishes and hair. His fingers were kinda of not really those belonging to a male, but if one wasn't paying attention, they'd say it was as slender and beautiful as a female's. His hair, oh, his wonderful hair... It was a bleached yellow (more yellow than white), I suppose, styled in the most attractive way. Huge sunglasses/goggle-like things sat perched upon his head. His eyes were beautiful. He had three thin strips of eye shadow on his eyelids - peach/white, red, peace/white, if I remember correctly. His eyes held a calm, gentle look to them, but at the same time, there was a hint of masculinity, a hint of hidden strength.

As Eunice, Laura, and I readied to take the pictures, he struck a small pose. It was perfect. (I don't know what word to use other than perfect!) It wasn't anything big, just looking at the camera and raising a hand, lowering the pinky and ring finger and bringing the rest close to his face. And then, his friend joined in for the second picture. Perfection yet again. He looked stunning, totally JRocker material! I realized I was close to drooling only after he had left.

We stared at him as he passed by several times, eventually summoning up the courage to ask him his name.

"Miju," he answered. Upon hearing his voice, I almost melted. It was soft, gentle, and kind. However, even with those beautiful attributes his voice had, there was more. His voice was quite similar to his eyes - there was a hidden sense of strength, and a small taste of masculinity. Absolutely... perfect. It wasn't too rough, wasn't too deep, wasn't too high, wasn't too anything. It was a perfect mix of everything perfect.

Laura, Eunice, and I were totally obsessed with him - especially me, sad to say. xD But I can't help it! He's... perfect. Imperfection always desires perfection.

Mmm... oh yeah, and this weird homeless guy went up to the guy in front of us and just harrassed him. He accused the fan (let's call him Guy A) of stealing his cousin and making her a whore, as well as scaring his brother off. He then turned to another fan nearby (Guy B) and accused him of being a fake friend. Of course, both parties were VERY angry - especially the fans, who knew nothing about what this guy was talking about. After a lot of fighting, arguments, and cursing, security FINALLY came and chased him off. Farther down the block, a police car lay in wait for him.

Oh yeah! And a bunch of people came by with video cameras and digital cameras, recording the length of the crowd. Whenever a camera would come towards us, Laura and I would yell either "PSYCHO!" or "JROCK PSYCHO!". XD Then later, a Japanese cameraman came to us. He said he was the interviewer... cameraman... person for Japanese TV, and would like to ask us some question. I was like, sure, why the heck not? He asked me stuff like, "Where did you hear about the bands playing tonight?" "Where did you hear about JRock Revolution?" "Which band did you come for?" "What is your favorite band?" "The concert is starting soon. How are you feeling?". I answered, "I heard about the bands long time ago, in a JRock-based forum called Batsu.org." "I heard about it from Batsu.org." "I came for D'espairsRay and Girugamesh." "It's hard to choose a favorite, but I'd have to say Dir en Grey." "I'm anxious, and very excited." And yeah. You get the idea.

Enna came by several times, she, too, walking back and forth. Eventually, after 3 pictures, we asked her for her name, as well as email. :3 Yay! *-* She's so pretty! <3 <3 I wish I grew up to look like her... xD

Later, the line started moving. It was quite chaotic, since not many people cared whether or not it was green or yellow. Just getting to the main line was the most important thing; no one cared about anything else. I think everyone was wondering why the line didn't circle the block, instead going in a straight line. But that question was never answered. In line, Eunice, Laura, and I made a plan. Laura would go buy merchandise for us (we'd pay her back later), while I led Eunice to the GA Area (right behind the Pit, it's pretty close to the stage). Just like yesterday, X-Japan's Last Live was playing on the huge screen. It got hot pretty quickly, with people pouring in every second. I was in the third "row" of people, but I planned to get to the first, just like yesterday. I knew shoving and brute strength would be involved, and I was prepared for it.

Again, just like yesterday, someone started shouting, "WE ARE..." so naturally, we all responded, "X!". This went on for a minute or so. :3 Yay for X-Japan! (;-; Rest in Peace, hide.)

Merry started playing first. Honestly, when they played, I didn't really feel it. Today was the first time I heard Merry's music. It wasn't that BAD, but it wasn't necessarily good, either. I used this time to move a bit right, where the people seemed less tightly knit. And then, I started my plan. Slowly, I shoved and forced myself to the front row. By the time Merry was done, and the intermission was in play, I was in front, just like yesterday. Anything for my JRock~ <3 Anyway. Yeah, Merry wasn't THAT bad. xD Some songs were good, some were weird. Their vocalist sure knows how to jump off tables and look awesome. xD But I had a feeling he was trying too hard to be like Kyo (Dir en Grey), since he was spitting a lot and letting the saliva either hang there, reach the floor, or dribble down his chest. Oh yeah. The barefoot vocalist did this handstand thingy on the table. It was cool. xD

Girugamesh was up after Merry. I swear, JRock Revolution - both nights - were AMAZING. The bands I knew and loved all played my favorite songs. Kagrra, performed Utakata... alice nine. performed Yami ni Chiru Sakura... and Girugamesh performed Volcano AND Jarring Fly! I went crazy once again. I jumped, I screamed, I headbanged, I cried... everything. xD Right in front of my eyes, Satoshi, Nii, Shuu, and Ryo were performing. They all looked GREAT, especially my favorite, Satoshi, and the runner up, Nii. They were amazing, pumping us up and performing with all their hearts. Sweat dripped off their heads, but they didn't stop for even a moment. It was GREAT seeing them headbang and move around, shaking their heads, signaling for us to cheer louder, and looking at us with pleasure gleaming in their dark eyes. I sung along with their songs, having listened to them for quite a while. It was GREAT seeing them perform live; all the discomfort (which was worse than yesterday) was worth it.

Following Girugamesh was D'espairsRay. I was overjoyed. Hizumi, Karyu, Zero, Tsukasa... they were all there. Hizumi looked AMAZING, with this... vest thingy on, revealing the middle area of his chest (he had a six pack forming there! XD Very slight). It was AWESOME. They, too, played a favorite: Mirror. We all sung along loudly, pumping our fists into the air, headbanging, cheering, and jumping. "Why don't you break the mirror? Just what you need now!" Even though the crowd was rougher than yesterday's, it was EXTREMELY hot, and my body was near battered, I didn't feel any discomfort or pain. I was too absorbed in D'espairsRay; too absorbed in their music, their dedication, their hard work. I absolutely LOVE Hizumi (which is why I yelled, "I LOVE YOU, HIZUMI!" every chance I got), but tonight, I felt extremely guilty for choosing a favorite. And so, after I yelled my love for the vocalist, I always added, "Karyu! Zero! Tsukasa! I LOVE YOU GUYS!"... which was absolutely true. I love all four of them to death, just as much as I love the Girugamesh boys.

After D'espairsRay had finished performing, Yoshiki came out (no Sugizo tonight. D:) and thanked us for supporting them, and asked us to keep doing so. We all agreed, and expressed our thanks through "THANK YOU!!!"s, hearts made from hands, and cheers. Yoshiki also mentioned that he would be going to the Japanese-con or whatever in France. xD And when we kinda complained, he said, "Maybe I'll just tour the world..." xD YAY!

MUCC was up next. They took forever to get ready, but when they did, it was GREAT. Honestly, I didn't know them very well before this concert, but it didn't matter. My favorite was, ever since I first heard of MUCC, Tatsuro. Of course, I love Satochi, Miya, and Yukke VERY much as well. Just like the vocalist of Merry, they were all barefoot (I don't know about Satochi, he was behind the drumset). They rocked hard, and I instantly fell in love with Libra. Of course, all the while, every chance I got, I yelled, "I LOVE YOU, TATSURO!" while the girl behind me yelled the same, except for Yukke. Yukke was AMAZING. He played the bass, then this... instrument (don't know what it's called. But it's an oversized violin thing that sounds similar to a bass, and is as big, if not bigger, than Yukke), and then the bass again. MUCC put on a very convincing and awesome performance, and I enjoyed it immensely.

Everything at JRock Revolution is overpriced, but who the heck cares? It's JROCK REVOLUTION. XD I bought a black JRock Revolution T-Shirt (I wanted a white one, but I guess Laura didn't hear me ask her to get me one...), a D'espairsRay T-Shirt, a Vidoll T-Shirt, and a DuelJewel Towel from both today and yesterday. But yeah. I had a LOT of fun. :3

I met Zeandra at the end of the concert, while I was waiting for my parents to pick me up. She came very late, which is why I didn't see her 'till then. Also, I found Miju and stared at him from far away. God, he is just so damn perfect... if only, if only...

"If only everyone else in this world was like Miju. -_- Then unhappiness wouldn't exist among women!" -Me and Laura.

Yeah... xD Okies, then. :3 Well, I hafta go take a shower and prepare to go to icky Yosemite tomorrow. -_- :3 Then I gotta paint my nails black just to offend my dad's prideful Korean friends. xP

Miju... I wonder what he's doing now? I know I'm being immature and over-obsessed, but I can't help it. He's just so mysterious, so perfect, so full of charisma... it was an instant attraction. Stay safe, healthy, and happy, Miju. I'll be praying so that we may meet again. <3

This is one of the best nights of my entire life.

So school finally lets out at around 3:00 after a round of wondrous Stanford testing (wondrous because Stanfords = No homework, get out early). My parents drop me off at the Wiltern, and I'm off to find Zeandra. She wouldn't answer her phone for a bit, so I kind of panicked and just walked around, eventually wandering to the place where Jo and I first met Alix and her. And then - finally - she answered the phone and guided me to where she was. We were pretty close, I suppose. Zeandra said that they were closer, but where shoved back when the Wiltern demanded single file lines and everyone in front called up the friends they saved spots for. (Zeandra had saved me a spot. :3 <3 Thanks!! She got there at around... 11:00-ish PM last night, and kinda stayed there overnight. xD)

After greeting Zeandra and her brother, Jo and Jane visited us. We talked, blah blah, Zeandra gave me this... picture thingy of a super hot guy whose name I don't know, blah blah, and Jane and I started counting the amount of people in front of us. I decided to stop at 201. There were bunches more ahead, so Zeandra and I were probably 300th-ish or the low 400ths in line. I'd bet for the former, though.

Mm... I ate my sandwich, blah blah blah, Jo and Jane leave, blah blah, I SEE YOSHIKI STEP OUT OF HIS CAR AND WAVE AT US (I screamed like crazy and waved enthusiastically), and yeah. x3 Zeandra and I socialized with the people behind us who were quite funny - and extremely fluent in Japanese. I saw a LOT of familiar people (familiar because I saw 'em at Dir en Grey's Tour07 Inward Scream), including that really pretty Aoi look-alike girl. <3

So yah. At around 6:20 or 30-ish, the line started moving. It was like the mosh pit. -_- EVERYONE just RAN forward, not caring about who they shoved - as long as they got there first, nothing mattered. I soon lost Zeandra in the whole mess, and just gave up trying to find her after a while. We were several feet away from the entrance. At that moment, I didn't care at all who I hurted. As long as I got to the entrance, got a chance to get close to the stage, nothing mattered. So I pushed and shoved like the rest of the crowd. (Seriously. D: It's like the Avalon all over again. 'Cept WAY better, 'course. No people beating you up by accident and stuff. xD Kinda...)

I got in the Wiltern. Unlike last time, during Dir en Grey's Inward Scream tour, I didn't head to the merchandise section first. That would have to wait. A good spot was my top priority. I speed-walked (since the guards inside the Wiltern were yelling, "DON'T RUN!") to the GA area, since the Pit was full. I was a row behind the front of the GA area. Wasn't too bad, I guess - but I wanted to see the JRockers without any head or arm obscuring my view. Eventually, I wormed my way to the front, and tightly held on to the small wall... thingy.

In the HUUUGGEEE screen thing that lay in front of the stage cover thingies (I'm totally brain dead, shush. Just trying to write this all down before I shower), they were playing X-Japan's Last Live. I nearly cried when I saw hide. But it was fun, nonetheless, watching all five of them run around, performing with all they had.

At 7:05, the screen went up, and the curtains parted. I screamed. The anxiety bubbling within me exploded, and I was just as loud as all 5 of the girls behind me put together.

It was dark, and in the smaller screen, these words came into view:

Kagrra,

I screamed louder, raising my right hand and closing the thumb, middle, and ring finger. "KAGRRA!" I yelled, excited. They came out, one by one, each with a smile on their faces. I nearly fainted, shouting impossibly louder (does that even make sense? Whatever...). They were there, a mere few feet away from me. Izumi. Nao. Shin. Akiya. And finally, Isshi. They all looked absolutely STUNNING - especially my favorite, Isshi~ ;3 As he sung, we jumped, we pounded our fists, we moved our hands like his, clapped...

And then, they played my favorite song: Utakata. I don't know what it is about that song that touches me so deeply, but whatever. As soon as I realized that it was UTAKATA they were playing, I cried. I was screaming, cheering, jumping, moving my hands (when I say hands, they're in the 'Rock On' position [Thumb, middle, ring finger down] unless I say so otherwise), singing along... and crying. I was happy beyond words. (They even played Yousai!)

Anyway, it was really cute when Isshi spoke to us in English. He had the words written down on a piece of paper, which he read to us. It was basically, 'We're Kagrra', 'Thanks for coming', 'thanks for your support', 'We will be back soon', etc. REALLY CUTE. Then they left the stage, much to my disappointment. They had played roughly 4-ish songs, but I was okay with that. Seeing AND hearing them live for even ONE song would have been enough for me.

The lights turned back on, the curtains closed, the huge screen came down, and starting playing X-Japan's Last Live again. I wondered if Yoshiki was watching this from the side, crying inwardly for hide. I knew I was. It seemed like an eternity before the curtains opened again, and the smaller screen showed this:

DuelJewel

In the little break, my throat ached, I was parched, and my body hurt from all that jumping and being shoved. But once they all came out onto the stage, I forgot about EVERYTHING but those JRockers performing on the stage. Shun, Yuya, Natsuki, Val, and Hayato - they were all magnificent. Honestly, I didn't like Duel Jewel that much before this concert. I listened to one song, and it didn't appeal to me very much. I found out what a fool I was when they started performing. I had just listened to the wrong song - Duel Jewel was simply <i>amazing</i>. I caught on their rhythms and movements pretty quickly, and rocked on with the rest of the crowd. They were truly great. <3 I couldn't keep my eyes off Hayato (well, okay... I did sneak several peeks at the rest of the band members. x3 But I looked at Hayato the most). His charisma, his voice, his movements... everything about him attracted me at once. I fell in love with Duel Jewel, and was 'Awww'ing as loud as everyone else when they announced that they would be playing one last song. It's just so cute. x3 They were like, "We're Duel Jewel!" "Thanks for your support!" and stuff. <3

Then there's another break time, when X-Japan's Last Live is shown (Yoshiki is CRAZY!). We could hear them tuning the guitars and testing the drums in the background, but no one cheered - mostly 'cause we all knew that they were all just roadies. xP

Next up was Miyavi. Honestly, as much as I love Miyavi, I was quite disappointed with his performance. He was all... American-ized, hip-hoppy, rappy, and... yeah. It was just... weird, I dunno. Drums were... weird (didn't look like drums), there was a guy tap dancing or whatever on wood, a weird ugly guy playing bass, some rappy hip hoppy guy beatboxing, some weirdo throwing rose petals all over Miyavi and painting some random stuff in the background, and a DJ. =/ Oh, Miyavi... ;~; You disappointed me. All the songs were... yeah. Hip hop-ish, beatbox-y... not what I expected, and definitely not pleasing. But everything changed when Miyavi said, "We have a special guest here tonight..."

That special guest was none other than Sugizo. He bounded in with his white guitar in hand, and smoothly joined Miyavi and the rest. I screamed loudly - 1/3 for Miyavi, 2/3 for Sugizo. It was great, though. :3 OH! And Miyavi also said, "I have a surprise for you all." In the smaller screen, these names flashed out in this order...

Yoshiki
Gackt
Sugizo
Miyavi

Yes. This was their new band. I was overjoyed. I knew that Yoshiki and Gackt were planning on making a band thingy together, but with SUGIZO AND MIYAVI?! HECK YES! Yeah, they played a bit, Yoshiki came out on stage and spoke to us. While he was coming out, an X-Japan song played, and once again, I cried as he came on the stage. He thanked us warmly, laughed and said it was nice meeting us on MySpace, and asked us for our continued support. We responded with cheers and "I LOVE YOU!"s.

Yoshiki told us that Gackt couldn't make it today, but he wanted to tell us 'Hi'. We responded enthusiastically. I must say, all of them, especially Yoshiki (no duh) are pretty good at English. :3 So cute. <3

Insert lotsa "BYE BYE!!!"s and another break thing / X-Japan's Last Live.

Then, oh my God, Vidoll was up. Tero, Giru, and Shun came out, each waving at us and firing us up. Then came Rame, dressed every so cutely. He threw us candy and, thank you Lord, I CAUGHT ONE! This is the first time I actually CAUGHT and KEPT something that a JRocker threw at a concert. I was overjoyed, of course! And then, Jui entered the stage, and everyone went ballistic. They started performing songs, and I was swept away once again. The closeness of the crowd no longer bothered me, the aching of my limbs and throat were easily forgotten. To me, all that mattered was myself and Vidoll.

Their songs and performance were, as expected, excellent. Jui was saying everything in Japanese, so I understood only bits of it. But basically, he said stuff like, "We'll continue to perform... and I'll continue to sing with all my heart". Iunno, something like that. But I cheered, just as I did for every other JRock band. I was beyond enthusiastic. Vidoll did a WONDERFUL job, I enjoyed it immensely.

Another break thingy.

And then... this was it. alice nine. I can still remember their expressions as they came onto the stage, waving at us and pumping us up, preparing their instruments... it's all so clear.

Nao came, followed by Tora and Saga. Hiroto came, receiving louder cheers. Haha, I remember how Tora kinda pouted, and came to the front of the stage, raising his hands. A VERY enthusiastic reaction was given, and he was satisfied. Then came my personal favorite... Shou. I screamed as loud as I could, and I swear, it's louder than those screams I unleashed during Dir en Grey's concert. I was EXTREMELY pleased with their performance. They did VERY well, and were extremely sexy. XD

They played Velvet first, much to my surprise. But the third song touched me the most, again drawing tears from me. It was my favorite alice nine. song: Yami ni Chiru Sakura. I headbanged along with the five, jumped up, screamed, and basically did everything at once. It was all so great! Then there was a bit of fan service (it's SO not alice nine. if there isn't!). Shou went up to Hiroto and kissed him on the cheek. I honestly don't like anything related to gay-ness, but it was just SO cute!! And it's SHOU and HIROTO we're talking about here. And they're alice nine. I'd support them even if they blew up half of the world. >.>

But yeah. :D It was an AWESOME performance, and I managed to record parts of Fantasy with my phone (really crappy quality, since everyone, including me, was SCREAMING, and stuff... xD Yeah...).

The wait and anxiety was definitely worth this show. The only disappointment I recieved was with Miyavi, but I didn't mind TOO much.

I rushed out and went to buy merchandise. I only had 55 bucks with me, and everything was overpriced. Most of the items were sold out already, so I bought would I could, which is 2 things. xD

I bought a black Vidoll shirt ($35), and a DuelJewel towel ($20). The heck I care if it's overpriced. >.>

Anndd... yeah. I CAN'T WAIT 'TILL THE SECOND PART! I'll try to write everything tomorrow... err, later if I have time, since I have to go to Yosemite. -_- Eww...

WE ARE... X! YOU ARE... X!

Mm... yeah. This is very short, mostly 'cause it's almost 1:00, I hafta shower, and I'm dead tired. Bye bye~

Too lazy to elaborate what happened at school. Lotsa drama, lotsa anger, lotsa cursing, lotsa people going emo, etc.

Mm... yeah. Sorry for the emo scare yesterday, but we all have our moments, right?

Well, something happened today that just made my day. My dad apologized to me with some of his home-made chocolate-dipped strawberries and kiss. <3 Thank you, Daddy.

;-; I'M DEPRIVED OF JROCK AND HEAVY METAL FOR A WEEK. Nooo! It's part of this... how addicted are you thing in "Metal School" (students: Me and Jo. xD Teacher: Elijah). I hate it. D: But actually, it's not too bad. u_u Yet. That's because usually, after school, I listen to Mike, Jason, Jin, Pham, Anita, Grace, etc. talk on Vent. But I swear I'll die on Saturday and Sunday, because those are the two days I NEED JRock. On the way to tennis, on the way back from tennis, on the way to fencing, on the way home from fencing, on the way to church, on the way to archery, on the way home from archery. Blaaaaaah~

Well, right now, the only ones on Vent are me, Mike, and Jin (they're playing CS). Right now, I'm just living off Midi of non-rock/heavy metal. ;-; Because piano = <3. I would totally listen to Hyde or something, since he's not really "heavy metal", but Elijah teacher said no Japanese, Chinese, etc. Only English. And, well... midi has no lyrics, so yeah. xP It's not too bad so far. :D